Mondo Lizzie Borden

Lizzie (excuse me, Lizzy) is mentioned briefly in this article from Legal Humour. She’s everywhere, she’s everywhere!

The Practice » Serious Look at Humour and Law
A “Serious” look at Humour and Law
By Marcel Strigberge

Stress buster

Humour is a major stress buster. It will allow you to detach yourself from a situation for long enough to interrupt the negative pattern before you nose dive and it will enable you to think clearly and recover the situation. Dr. Viktor Frankl, noted psychiatrist who spent time in concentration camps during WW2 credits a sense of humour with saving not only himself but others who regularly deployed it. He in fact discusses a favourite device of his, logotherapy. If for example if you are afraid of sweating in public, he suggests that instead of telling yourself “I won’t sweat, I won’t sweat”, do the opposite. Tell yourself, “This time in front of that CBA crowd as I address them I’ll sweat 10 litres worth.” This has worked for many of his patients who were afraid of screwing up one way or another.

I find many uses of this approach in family law practice. Sometimes I feel terrorized by a certain counsel. I had a lawyer opposing me once whom my office staff called “Dr. Fax”. A day did not go by without him sending me a fax, or two, or three. This guy confirmed anything and everything. We’d chat about our case on Monday morning when he would tell me my client returned the kids 7:15 rather that 7:00 the night before. I’d say something like, “OK, my client is a rogue and a knave.” Ten minutes later I’d get a fax from the good doctor confirming that I agreed that my client was a rogue and a knave.

Initially these faxes bothered me, a lot. It felt like that Chinese water torture. Drip…drip…bong. Eventually I decided to do something about it and have fun. We started an unofficial fax pool or lottery. People were to guess when Dr. Fax’s next fax was to come. Our receptionist would say on Friday afternoon, “I’ll take Monday morning at 9:01″. This was usually a safe bet.

I similarly find it useful to use humour when some other Attila’s presence puts me off. Rather than minimizing the terror, I rephrase it. I do indeed see a monster, with smoke snorting out of his or her nostrils. I imagine Lizzy Borden in a robe and tabs coming after my client and me with a cleaver. Seen this way it don’t look so bad. Or as cartoon character Foghorn Leghorn would say, “Ah say, it don’t look so bad”.

You will note in the above examples that humour was used both in dealing with others and with myself.

From the New York Times, October 18, 1893:

In an ongoing series about original Lizzie Borden items you can purchase, I bring you le Magasin des Morts, a shop owned by Maryellen Skulski. I first found Maryellen through eBay, where she is known as morbidmaryellen.

Her site boasts this: “Get the HIPPEST stuff on the web featuring Massachusetts’ favorite alleged AXE MURDERESS…Lizzie Borden!” And that’s no lie!

Been looking high and low for hatchet earrings? Look no further. They are also the originators of the FREE LIZZIE t-shirt and the Lizzie Finishing School items. Great prices too!

More today on the Bewitched convention in Salem, MA in TownOnline.com. Of note is the group’s plan to also tour the Lizzie Borden B&B. It seems Elizabeth Montgomery will always be Lizzie Borden and Samantha Stephens to her fans. And to us.

“We’re having such a good time, we’re thinking of doing it in Salem every other year,” said Simpson while driving a group to Fall River Tuesday to see the Lizzie Borden Bed and Breakfast. In addition to her role of TV witch Samantha Stephens, Elizabeth Montgomery also played Lizzie Borden, the girl accused of killing her parents in 1892, in a TV movie.

“the girl”? 32 years old is not a “girl”—she was a full grown woman by that age.

On Semantic Compositions is a pretty funny short piece entitled “Lizzie Borden should’ve used a gun”. I recommend it to you.

I used to do these all the time. They are loads of fun. Here is one I found that is Lizzie related: Famous Trials. Remember, it is due Thursday, April 15, before 9 am! Well, that is what it says!

Download it here. No answers included. Oh, and this is one of those sites that spells Lizzie’s name Lizzy (the item is from the Appalachian School of Law—I am not kidding!).

Lizzie is mentioned briefly in this BostonHerald.com news item that appears today about a Bewitched convention. Salem seems like the place to be this weekend. Kewl!

From Jonathan Katz’ To-Do Lists of the Dead, 2000:

From the New York Times, June 5, 1894:

In the vol. 174, 2002 of Military Law Review, posted on jagcnet.army.mil website, is a curious reference to Lizzie Borden. Or should I say “Lizzy” Borden.

In what appears to be the text of a speech presented on November 21, 2002, on “Constitutional Dignity and the Criminal Law,” Judge James E. Baker, from the United States Court of Appeals for the Armed Forces, is addressing the 26th Criminal Law New Developments Course. About half way through his speech he makes the following statements:

Americans are fascinated by the criminal law. During prime time there are two crime shows on network television every night. Television reflects our tastes, and some suggest, contributes to those tastes by fostering the very violence depicted.

For sure, as Stanford University law professor Lawrence Friedman has pointed out, there is an element of prurient interest to this fascination. The criminal law allows us a look at the lives of the rich and famous, and perhaps, in the fall from fame or wealth of a Claus von Bulow or an O.J. Simpson, we may gain confidence that happiness is not found in wealth or fame alone, if at all. Lizzy Borden and Charles Manson remain a revolting part of America’s culture, and not because of the legal importance of their trials.

I find it interesting that Lizzie is placed in the same context as Charles Manson, which of course insinuates that she was tried and convicted of her crimes, which we know she was not. Perhaps the Judge is not referring to this aspect as their commonality, but rather the gruesome nature of the crimes they were accused of committing. However, since Lizzie was judged as “not guilty” of the crimes, I find it upsetting to see a learned individual such as this use Lizzie in this fashion. He could have easily have used a different person, a Jeffrey Dahmer or a John Wayne Gacy, or even Richard Speck—someone who killed and killed again and were found guilty of their crimes.

Here is the complete speech, all 18 pages, in one PDF for downloading. Enjoy!

Here is a photo I took of the Borden’s Swansea farm last August:

And here, fresh out of the digital camera, is the Swansea farm today, courtesy of Michael Brimbau:

There are quite a few changes, I notice. Not only the color, but the door on the left is different, the pipes (rain gutters?) that run down the front right and left sides are not there anymore, and the door shutters have been removed. It is definitely cleaner looking. Whenever they clean up houses around here, that ususally means the house will soon be up for sale. Stay tuned!

According to the Emery University Violence Studies Newsletter, Fall 1999, a then new book was announced that appears to include an essay on Lizzie Borden. Says the newsletter:

While helping to organize the Violence Studies Program two years ago, Professor Michael Bellesiles discovered that there was no general history of American violence. Encouraged by New York University Press, Bellesiles brought together twenty original essays in the volume Lethal Imagination: Violence and Brutality in American History, which has just been published.

This book includes articles by: Emory Professors Catherine Ross Nickerson, English and ILA, on Lizzy Borden; Professor Mary Odem, History, on the cultural and social contexts of rape; Dr. Arthur Kellermann, Director of the Center for Injury Control, on the impact of gun ownership; and Uche Egemonye, a student in the Law School, on African American women and

yes, the quote just ends. This is how it is in the newsletter.

Anyhow, I ordered the book and will report back regarding Dr. Nickerson’s article. By the by, Nickerson’s essay was reviewed by Lisa Zawadzki in the October 1999 Lizzie Borden Quarterly. It pays to reread those gems every once in a while. You never know what you will re-discover!

Here is a complete list of the book’s contents:

Lethal imagination : violence and brutality in American history (Michael A. Bellesiles, ed.; 1999). Includes Introduction / Michael A. Bellesiles — Kieft’s War and the cultures of violence in colonial America / Evan Haefeli — “Shee would bump his mouldy britch”: authority, masculinity, and the harried husbands of New Haven Colony, 1638-1670 / Ann M. Little — Colonial and Revolutionary era slave patrols of Virginia / Sally E. Hadden — The social origins of dueling in Virginia / Bruce C. Baird — Women of domestic violence in nineteenth-century North Carolina / Laura F. Edwards — Complicity and deceit: Lewis Cheney’s plot and its bloody consequences / Junius P. Rodriguez — Good men and notorious rogues: vigilantism in Massac County, Illinois, 1846-1850 / Nicole Etcheson — Armed and “more or less dangerous”: women and violence in American frontier literature, 1820-1860 / Laura McCall — Seduced, betrayed, and revenged: the murder trial of Mary Harris / Lee Chambers-Schiller — To live and die in Dodge City: body counts, law and order, and the case of Kansas v. Gill / Robert R. Dykstra — Word and deed: the language of lynching, 1820-1953 / Christopher Waldrep — “The deftness of her sex”: innocence, guilt, and gender in the trial of Lizzie Borden / Catherine Ross Nickerson — Treat her like a lady: judicial paternalism and the justification for assaults against Black women, 1865-1910 / Uche Egemonye — “The Negro would be more than an angel to withstand such treatment”: African- American homicide in Chicago, 1875-1910 / Jeffrey S. Adler — Homosociality and the legal sanction of male heterosexual aggression in the early twentieth century / John C. Pettegrew — “The unspeakable Mrs. Gunness”: the deviant woman in early-twentieth-century America / Paula K. Hinton — Cultural representations and social contexts of rape in the early twentieth century / Mary E. Odem –Violence by design: contraceptive technology and the invasion of the female body / Andrea Tone — The Monroe Rifle Club: finding justice in an “ungodly and social jungle called Dixie” / Craig S. Pascoe — Armed and dangerous: guns in American homes / Arthur L. Kellermann and Philip J. Cook.

Eldridge Publishing offers a book of monologues for “teen actors” called 1400 Boxes of Jello and Other Monologues. The book is by Daniel S. Kehde, and presumably, he wrote the pieces included. Here is the description of the content:

These 21 monologues for teen actors are wise, witty and full of twists and surprises. Each opens a unique window on either a familiar fairy tale character, an unusual historical figure, or a present-day youngster. There’s Snow White’s teenage daughter who’s shocked to discover that her mom lived with dwarfs and worked as a maid! Or Lizzy Borden confessing her crimes to her last victims, knowing they will never tell. Or the high school girl whose breakup with her boyfriend leads to tragedy. There’s also the narrator of the title monologue who can’t understand why the victim of a hilarious prank is so upset. This collection of young voices makes for a fun, thought-provoking, and emotionally satisfying experience. #2211 Resource Book - $14.95

I think I need to read this one and report back. Sounds like he has Lizzie as a serial killer!

The Camden County College, in New Jersey, is offering a large selection of tuition-free Professional Development workshops for teachers and community members. Of note is the offering for the Blackwood Campus: “Murders That Changed the Course of History.”

MURDERS THAT CHANGED THE COURSE OF HISTORY
This workshop will exam infamous acts of violence and the significant impact these dastardly deeds have had on the course of history.
DATES: TUESDAYS, MAY 16, MAY 23, MAY 30, JUNE 6, JUNE 13
TIME: 6 TO 8:30 P.M.
LOCATION: ADAM 008 (BLACKWOOD CAMPUS)
COURSE NUMBER: IDY – 209-58
MURDER OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN (MAY 16) Probably no single event in 19th century America had so profound an impact on the course of history as the assassination of Abraham Lincoln. Participants will learn how this single act of violence helped changed American history forever.
JACK THE RIPPER MURDERS (MAY 23) Beginning in August 1888, a series of murders took place in the Whitechapel section of London that sent shock waves through the city. Participants will learn how the unsolved murders of five women spawned a reform movement in Britain that dramatically changed the nature of British society.
LIZZY BORDEN MURDER CASE (MAY 30) The gruesome axe murders of Andrew and Abby Borden in 1892 and the trial of their daughter, Lizzy, generated national publicity, and raised important social and legal issues.
ASSASSINATIONS OF RASPUTIN & THE RUSSIAN ROYAL FAMILY (JUNE 6) Few events had a greater impact on the history of the world than the murders of Rasputin and the Romanov family. Their deaths affected the outcome of World War I and directly contributed to the rise of Communism in Russia.
LINDBERGH KIDNAPPING (JUNE 13) The trial of the alleged kidnapper of Charles Lindbergh’s son was as famous as that of Lizzy Borden. The “Crime of the Century” as it was called, and the subsequent behavior of Lindbergh influenced American attitudes toward entrance into World War II and affected the laws related to kidnapping.

I see this a lot: spelling Lizzie as “Lizzy”–happens on eBay all the time. Makes searching for her especially complicated! But it does sound like it was a cool course! And it must be a big draw as this is the second year they have offered it.

If you want to see what else they are offering, here is the complete PDF of the summer workshops, including registration form.

From the New York Times, December 19, 1902:

Back in June, I blogged about a not too pretty Lizzie newspaper illustration that seemed to age her for us, making her, well, rather unattractive.

I have since found a magazine illustration from PIC Magazine from 1938 that attempts to do the opposite: make Lizzie sexy. They added makeup, I guess, a little lipstick, and sort of updated her for the 30s. It almost doesn’t look like her anymore.

This image begs the question, however: did Lizzie Borden wear makeup?

The late poetess Ruth Whitman published a collection of poetry in 1973 and titled it The Passion of Lizzie Borden. It is a very nice book and since Lizzie is in the title, and one of the longer poems in the book is about Borden, it is a fine addition to any Lizzie Borden collection.

There is one on eBay right now that has a starting bid of only 1 cent. Cool, huh? Well, not so fast amigo. Look at that shipping fee: $5.00 for MEDIA MAIL, which would actually cost the seller under a buck for this slim volume. So here we have the classic snarley auction tactic: sell the item for cheap and jack up the shipping to make up the difference in item price. Please don’t fall for this type of disreputable behavior. You can grab this title on Abebook.com for under 5 dollars and shipping is a reasonable $3.50. I use Abebooks.com all the time and the book arrives very quickly and I have always (knock on wood) been happy with the condition matching the book’s description in the listing. On eBay, on the other hand, I have more than a few times been disappointed with the book’s wear. In once case, the seller even misread the jacket and sold the book as a Lizzie connected item when it wasn’t.

Thanks to Auds for this link—it is a good one. And it is directly related to Lizzie Borden. In fact, our fair lady of Fall River figures prominently in the story. I suggest you scurry on over there and read it. Now, please. You’ll thank me, and Auds, later.

Fake Lizzie photo by Harry Widdows.

A crime writer in Toronto is retiring after 34 years on the beat. His name is Max Haines. He is the author of over 2,500 articles and 27 books! Some of the titles include: True Crime Stories, Doctors Who Kill, Murders Strange But True, Bothersome Bodies, Murder Most Foul, Crime Flashback, and others. I can’t say I have heard of him, but he seems like the Ann Rule of Canada, writing true crime collections for mass consumption.

There is an article about his very interesting career in the Toronto Sun titled “After 34 years of columns and 27 books, ‘Mr. Murder’ Max Haines has decided it’s time to stop killing himself”—pretty good hook, wouldn’t you say?

What’s this got to do with Lizzie Borden, you ask? Well, according to the article, the very first piece that Mr. Haines wrote was on Lizzie! I think I’ll have to read some of his work now that I found out about him!

It’s the evening and you have nothing to do? How about listening to some old time horror radio shows? Sounds like fun to me!

Lux Radio Theatre, Mysterious Traveler, Lights Out, Quiet Please, and many more! No Lizzie though.

Old Time Horror Radio.

And more from The Old Time Radio Fan!.

Have a high speed Internet connection and don’t know how fill up your bandwidth? Here’s a cool idea! ChannelChooser lets you watch all sorts of TV streamed to you desktop.

Channels include Classic Movies, Golf, Cycling, Poker, Baby, Relaxing, Crime, Mystery, Police, BBC News, Bloomberg, Research—gosh the list is HUGE!

Check it out (yes it is free) at: ChannelChooser.com.

And here is a list of TV Channels you can watch on the web!