You Know You are From Fall River if . . .

From the MySpace page of Veronica Paige:

you know you’re from fall river if…

i may not live there anymore, but you gotta represent!

¢¾ You have ever “cruised the ave,” or even spoke the term “cruise the ave.”
¢¾ You know who Lizzie Borden is and how many “whacks” were involved.
¢¾ You refer to everyone on Earth as “guy.”
¢¾ You have a rock solid preference when it comes to ordering from Domino’s or Papa Gino’s.
¢¾ You know who “Skip” Karam is.
¢¾ You attended, are attending, or are destined to attend B.M.C. Durfee High School.
¢¾ You know who Mr. Attar is/was.
¢¾ You have at least some Portuguese in you.
¢¾ You also know all the Portuguese swears.
¢¾ You live in a 3-family victorian tenement.
¢¾ Your grandparents worked in the mills.
¢¾ You are aware that you have a 50/50 shot at having the Brightman St. Bridge be closed for repairs.
¢¾ The Taunton River is like a part of you, but you’d never dare swim in it.
¢¾ You know exactly what “Fall River Celebrates” every August.
¢¾ You take your chow mein strained, thank you very much.
¢¾ You have the thickest dialect in the country–to the point where it is no longer English.
¢¾ You don’t say, “He got his ears pierced,” you say, “He got his ee-yiz pee-isst.”
¢¾ Your favorite cold drink is coffee milk and your favorite hot drink is a Dunkin Donuts “Lahge, extra cream, extra suga.”
¢¾ Providence is 15 minutes to the right, New Bedford is 15 minutes to the left, and Boston is an hour up.
¢¾ In the summer, you can be found at Horseneck.
¢¾ Westport means The Beach.
¢¾ You’ve never come to an intersection without seeing “NO TURN ON RED.”
¢¾ You have friends named Manny and Miguel. Their last names are either Medeiros, Mello, Silva, or De-something.
¢¾ You’re Catholic.
¢¾ You call it a “grinder”–not a sub or a hoagie.
¢¾ You’ll fight to the death defending your grinder shop, Marzilli’s or Marcucci’s.
¢¾ You use the word “wicked” as in “wicked good” more than all the people in Boston combined.
¢¾ New Bedford sucks!
¢¾ Providence might as well be your capital.
¢¾ You were born at Charlton Memorial.
¢¾ You can’t remember a time when Ed Lambert wasn’t the mayor.
¢¾ You’ve ever counted the humps on the “Seven Hills” to see if there are actually seven hills.
¢¾ You’re from “Faw Riva.”