Lizzie Borden Society Forum

The Ballad of OJ Simpson
A parody sung to the tune of, "The Ballad of Lizzie Borden"

Original Tune By: Chad Mitchell Trio, 1961



Yesterday out in Los Angeles, Nicole and Ronald died.
And they busted OJ Simpson on a charge of homicide.
Well, he might not have done it, but the media thinks he did,
And Michael Jackson's volunteered ... to take care of the kids!

'Cause you can't cut your exes up in California,
Contrary to all popular belief.
No, you can't cut your exes up in California,
You know it's gonna cause a lot of grief.


Well, he might have used a razor, 'cause the airline list his gun,
But he didn't use a hatchet, 'cause THAT'S ALREADY BEEN DONE!
Now poor OJ's in the jailhouse, and they're looking for the knife.
For just ten million dollars, he might get off with life!


'Cause you can't cut up your exes in California,
And then blame all the damage on the heat.
No, you can't cut up your exes in California,
With evidence upon the Bronco seat!


You can sell a ton of crack and the cops will turn their back.
You can rape and burn and loot; they don't want another suit.
You can peddle phony stock like they do in Little Rock,
But you can't turn your ex into a Pez Dispenser.
California is a far cry from DC!


No, you can't cut up your exes in California,
And then go out and drive around the town!
No, you can't cut up your exes in California,
It's almost sure to make the jury frown!

http://www.usd.edu/~bwjames/humor/ojballad.html

I'll be disappointed to learn you didn't write it.
Its not as catchy as the Lizzie jingle (took an axe). IMO

I wonder if I'll still be around when they have the "O.J Simpson Forum" I don't think he did it, and never have, but talk about a case with twists and turns and police screw ups, and it fits the bill! I still can't understand how he could be found not guilty by twelve of his peers, and still be taken to court and sued for it.

Thanks Missy! That was interesting!
Did you see, last week, a show called *20 of The All-Time Most Famous Crimes* or some such name?
The OJ case was like #3.
Manson got #1, still.

shakiboo @ Sat Oct 28, 2006 4:47 pm wrote:I wonder if I'll still be around when they have the "O.J Simpson Forum" I don't think he did it, and never have, but talk about a case with twists and turns and police screw ups, and it fits the bill! I still can't understand how he could be found not guilty by twelve of his peers, and still be taken to court and sued for it.

Anyone accused of an infamous crime will be considered guilty by a lot of people, even if they are acquitted. Many people have their minds made up by the first news and never change their opinion even after more facts come out. That's why a judge tells jurors to wait until they hear all the testimony.

I first thought "guilty" but the news later that year (especially from "Hard Copy" which has been banned from TV) convinced me to doubt the prosecution.
The Timeline is the most important. The Limo driver arrived about 10:22pm and parked outside. He saw no person or car leave or enter the compound. At 10:45pm he rang the bell so they would open the gate, and he drove in. Just after 11pm he drove OJ to the airport. This proves that OJ could not have personally murdered anyone that night.
We know that Ron punched out about 9:58pm and walked 1/2 mile to his apartment (10:12pm?). He changed out of his white shirt and black pants (part of his waiter uniform) and into the jeans, T-shirt, and flannel shirt found on his body. He then walked 2 block to where that friends' car was parked (10:20 or later). We know he had food in his stomach, I don't know where he ate. Then he drove to Nicoles' place and parked a block away, and walked to her front gate. That puts the murder after 11pm.
The fresh liquid blood found by the police after 12;15am says the murders likely occurred about 11:40 (just before that couple walked by and saw the body).

Any disagreements?

Kat @ Sat Oct 28, 2006 8:55 pm wrote:Thanks Missy! That was interesting!
Did you see, last week, a show called *20 of The All-Time Most Famous Crimes* or some such name?
The OJ case was like #3.
Manson got #1, still.

I would put the unsolved assassination of JFK at #1. How did they rank it?

Have you seen"The O.J Simpson Case" It's done by Richard James Wagner.....online?? It's a fascinating read!

shakiboo @ Sun Oct 29, 2006 4:50 pm wrote:Have you seen"The O.J Simpson Case" It's done by Richard James Wagner.....online?? It's a fascinating read!

Could you post the site address?
Basically its over. Most people think OJ did it, just as they think Lizzie did it. What can I say?

In "The Case of the Long-Legged Model" the fictional Perry Mason notes that murders by organized crime are seldom solved by the police. Still true today?

Years ago I found one site Geocities.com that went into details on the circumstances of this case. Some speculation as well.

Hi Ray, here's the web address for that site, I tried it to make sure it would get you there and it brought up a web page and the one you want is the first one on it title...."The O.J Simpson Case. " Let me know if you get there alright and what you think of it....... sorry it took me so long to get it to you

shakiboo @ Mon Oct 30, 2006 12:15 am wrote:Hi Ray, here's the web address for that site, I tried it to make sure it would get you there and it brought up a web page and the one you want is the first one on it title...."The O.J Simpson Case. " Let me know if you get there alright and what you think of it....... sorry it took me so long to get it to you

The geocities site went into subjects that weren't brought into the trial. Either the prosecution or defense can do it.
It asked questions about things what would not be germane to the case.
Did OJ have a small package like a shaving kit? Where did it go? It speculated about OJ's travels, and what Nicole might have said.